Skepticism aside, away I went plopping those K-Cups into the machine each morning, pulling the lever, pressing the button and making one cup at a time. It was me versus the environment, and I win — every time.
Part of the thrill of the machine has to do with the engineering. The thing is a modern marvel. In no way should a human be able to brew just one cup of coffee in seconds flat. It defies all expectation.
When I was growing up, “Star Trek: The Next Generation” promised that someday we’d all walk around reading Shakespeare from a small black tablet computer. Today I own an iPad; the bookstore there tells me I’m free to download Shakespeare any time I want. “Back to the Future II” told me that by 2015 I’d have a giant flat-screen TV, a video phone and a Black & Decker food re-hydrator. Right now, I’ve got a nice HD TV — the flat-screen kind — and I can Skype anyone with a webcam from my smartphone.
The point is, is that I’m pretty sure if director Robert Zemeckis had chosen to quickly pan right in that scene, you would have seen that good old Mrs. McFly was re-hydrating that Pizza Hut pie next to a K-Cup machine.
The future is now, and it’s irresistible to not be a part of it. For me, and I suspect many other people, the convenience of having exactly the coffee you want, exactly when you want it, outweighs any f— given about the environment. In that way, it’s a lot like driving a car.
Keurig, I love you, but you’re bringing me down.
Mike Townshend is a writer and journalist living at a compound — a Fortress of Solitude, if you will — at an undisclosed location in the Hudson Valley. For the past few weeks, rather than unearthing the Mr. Coffee, he has gone through the trouble of cleaning that stupid K-Cup filter basket multiple times a day.
